Q:
I just got asked to be a bridesmaid in one of my closest friend's weddings. I obviously want to be a part of this since we've known each other forever. However, she told everyone that she understands that in this economy, if we can't afford it, we can say no. I am pretty tight on money (I have some savings, but I'm not going crazy with them). But the thing is, I don't know how much it would cost so I am not sure of my answer yet. Obviously it varies, but I was wondering if you could give me an estimate of what you think it'd be, or at least the rundown of what I'd be responsible for, and maybe what proper etiquette is with things. For instance, I understand I have no say in the dress choice, but in other matters, say if all the other bridesmaids want to do a spa day/morning, am I obligated to do that with them? Or can I save by politely skipping out?
A: You're right that it's no small commitment to be in a wedding - financial or otherwise. Here's the rundown of what a bridesmaid is usually responsible for financially during the wedding, and my estimate of about how much I've usually paid for each item. I broke it down per wedding-related event for you.
Wedding
Bachelorette Party
Bridal Shower
ESTIMATED TOTAL $745 and up
I know it looks like a big scary commitment, but since you asked, I wanted to give you the best idea of what you might be responsible for. Keep in mind that if the wedding is local, or if you can stay with family or friends, you will save a lot of money. You're right that you don't really have a choice in what you wear, but yes, you can opt out of a spa day. It sounds like you have a budget-conscious bride, so hopefully she'll be understanding if you'd prefer to do your own hair, etc. My best advice to you, if you agree to be in the wedding, is that you should be up front about your financial situation, and be clear from the beginning that you can't afford a lot of "luxury" activities, but you still want to be a part of the big day and would love to participate in other ways (i.e. stuffing envelopes, etc.).
xo, Genius of Honor
A: You're right that it's no small commitment to be in a wedding - financial or otherwise. Here's the rundown of what a bridesmaid is usually responsible for financially during the wedding, and my estimate of about how much I've usually paid for each item. I broke it down per wedding-related event for you.
Wedding
- Dress $100-$200
- Alterations $75
- Shoes $50
- Hair $75 (plus tip)
- Jewelry $30
- Mani/Pedi $30 and up
- Present $50-75 Try to split this cost w/ other bridesmaids
- Transportation $100 and up
- Accomodations $80 and up
Bachelorette Party
- Gift $40
- Drinks & Dinner $100 and up
Bridal Shower
- Gift $40
- Party expenses $50 and up
ESTIMATED TOTAL $745 and up
I know it looks like a big scary commitment, but since you asked, I wanted to give you the best idea of what you might be responsible for. Keep in mind that if the wedding is local, or if you can stay with family or friends, you will save a lot of money. You're right that you don't really have a choice in what you wear, but yes, you can opt out of a spa day. It sounds like you have a budget-conscious bride, so hopefully she'll be understanding if you'd prefer to do your own hair, etc. My best advice to you, if you agree to be in the wedding, is that you should be up front about your financial situation, and be clear from the beginning that you can't afford a lot of "luxury" activities, but you still want to be a part of the big day and would love to participate in other ways (i.e. stuffing envelopes, etc.).
xo, Genius of Honor